[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.16″ min_height=”533.5px” custom_padding=”3px||3px||true|false” da_disable_devices=”off|off|off” global_colors_info=”{}” da_is_popup=”off” da_exit_intent=”off” da_has_close=”on” da_alt_close=”off” da_dark_close=”off” da_not_modal=”on” da_is_singular=”off” da_with_loader=”off” da_has_shadow=”on”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.24.0″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” min_height=”544.5px” custom_margin=”|auto|15px|auto|false|false” custom_padding=”||0px|||” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n
In the average family home, kids grow up with access to a wide range of devices and digital tools. In the UK, for example, the average home with kids has access to <\/span>at least 15 different internet-enabled devices<\/span><\/a>, from iPads to laptops, to a parent\u2019s phone, or the Echo Dot on the counter. <\/span>For kids now, technology is ever-present, and will accompany them at every stage of their lives:<\/b> in education, as a form of entertainment, in their social lives, and looking into the future, at work.<\/span><\/p>\n Considering this, it\u2019s important for families to talk about – and demonstrate – healthy, responsible tech use from a young age. One way to navigate digital rules and<\/span> establish positive relationships with technology is by creating a family contract, better described as technology guidelines, or a family tech agreement<\/b>. This can act as a springboard for productive conversations and offer guidelines that everyone feels comfortable following.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Talking about tech use in a mindful, responsible, and respectful way is part of the process for any parent. However, for any agreement to be effective, lasting, and conflict-free, the approach we take is key. For a family tech contract, or better yet, agreement to be successful, we need to take the focus off setting rules (which, as the saying goes, are made to be broken), and shift it towards <\/span>creating an open, constructive dialogue, which helps all family members use technology in a healthy way<\/b>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n To get you started, Qustodio offers two free downloadable digital agreements, which can set up a workshop session you can regularly revisit as a family. The family agreements – one for younger kids, and one for teens and tweens – are a useful resource for families looking to get started with the process. Download the appropriate agreement for your family below.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row column_structure=”1_2,1_2″ _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][qusd_info_card title=”Digital agreement for under 8s” description=”A free guide to starting your family technology contract, designed for kids aged 8 and under” link_text=”Download free” link_url=”https:\/\/static.qustodio.com\/public-site\/uploads\/2022\/08\/03094901\/2022-07-Digital-Agreement-1.pdf?_gl=1*18rr0b6*_gcl_aw*R0NMLjE3MzgxNDE5NzcuQ2owS0NRaUF3T2U4QmhDQ0FSSXNBR0tlRDU3YXhwaDFqbmJHdzNpMUNMa1EtRkh1QzJ4NjNCRjZxLXJYMVZRY1laMnJVWHA2d1RYQkpJUWFBaXpSRUFMd193Y0I.*_gcl_au*Nzg2MzgzNzY2LjE3Mzk4MDM3NDY.” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”||||false|false” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/qusd_info_card][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][qusd_info_card title=”Digital agreement for tweens & teens” description=”Your free walkthrough for a family technology contract, designed for tweens and teens” link_text=”Download free” link_url=”https:\/\/static.qustodio.com\/public-site\/uploads\/2022\/09\/09125558\/2022-07-Digital-Agreement_teens_ENG.pdf?_gl=1*7hj7h3*_gcl_aw*R0NMLjE3MzgxNDE5NzcuQ2owS0NRaUF3T2U4QmhDQ0FSSXNBR0tlRDU3YXhwaDFqbmJHdzNpMUNMa1EtRkh1QzJ4NjNCRjZxLXJYMVZRY1laMnJVWHA2d1RYQkpJUWFBaXpSRUFMd193Y0I.*_gcl_au*Nzg2MzgzNzY2LjE3Mzk4MDM3NDY.” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/qusd_info_card][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.19.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”36px|||||” custom_padding=”0px||0px||true|false” da_disable_devices=”off|off|off” global_colors_info=”{}” da_is_popup=”off” da_exit_intent=”off” da_has_close=”on” da_alt_close=”off” da_dark_close=”off” da_not_modal=”on” da_is_singular=”off” da_with_loader=”off” da_has_shadow=”on”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.19.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”11px|||||” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.19.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n First, you\u2019ll want to create a positive, welcoming environment, where everyone feels comfortable sharing. Choose a stress-free moment, such as a weekend where there are no plans, to set the conversation up. You can help create a relaxed, laid-back setting by combining other elements that remove the \u201cserious family discussion\u201d element, such as a picnic, or as you enjoy an afternoon snack together.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Once you\u2019ve decided on the perfect opportunity, think of an activity you can do together – one that\u2019s age-appropriate, and tech-related. This serves as an icebreaker and will get them motivated for the conversation. For example, you could play a video game together, or explore a new app that allows you to get creative with them. You could even <\/span>show them what digital wellbeing tools or <\/b>parental monitoring<\/b><\/a> look like, how they work<\/b>, and how they can be used to <\/span>promote healthier digital habits.<\/b> This can help set up a productive conversation, where kids can see that these tools aren\u2019t being used to control, but rather to protect. This focus shift from control to collaboration encourages them to participate, and brings a more positive angle to the conversation.<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Now you\u2019ve grabbed your kids\u2019 attention, the next part of the process is key: involving them. <\/span>Establishing rules and boundaries shouldn\u2019t be a one or two-person show, but a process where we listen to our kids\u2019 input<\/b> and take their needs into account, even if what they think doesn\u2019t match up with your point of view or the risks you know are real.<\/span><\/p>\n To avoid the conversation being hyper-focused on setting rules and limits that restrict your kids, encourage them to share positive experiences they\u2019ve had, along with apps and games they like. <\/span>They should feel comfortable sharing what they enjoy and what they don\u2019t<\/b>, so that the rules and ideas you discuss can be put in place to help them enjoy the good sides, while reducing negative experiences. Sharing worries and negative situations in a family space can also serve as an environment where you offer guidance, giving kids advice on how to face them and what they should do if they encounter risk online.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Now you\u2019re all ready to begin, here are some tips to help guide the conversation and keep it productive:<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n 1. Share your own experiences<\/b><\/p>\n Sometimes your kids won\u2019t be willing to share, or might not be able to think of a situation – either positive or negative – that they want to talk about. In this case, <\/span>you can act as the example, sharing your own experiences first<\/b>, again not only focusing on negative aspects of technology, but sharing the things you love and the ways it helps you. By sharing only the bad, your kids might think you have an outdated view of technology, or that you simply want to restrict how they access the digital world, which might not encourage them to share as openly.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n 2. Practice \u201cactive listening\u201d\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n <\/b>It\u2019s a good idea to repeat what your kids say throughout the conversation, to reflect their thoughts back, show interest in the different points they might raise, and try to avoid interrupting them or criticizing the way they think. On the other hand, <\/span>as parents, we shouldn\u2019t be afraid to share our thoughts with our kids,<\/b> to create an environment where everyone feels they can share and their views are worth listening to. We have to be able to exchange opinions freely, even when they\u2019re different. <\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n 3. Take turns suggesting ideas<\/b><\/p>\n To create a balanced and fair digital agreement, where everyone feels included, try having each family member suggest their own rule or guideline. <\/span>Debate the proposed rules and come to a consensus<\/b> about which ones you\u2019d like to include, and which ones you\u2019d prefer to leave out. This will help you come up with rules that are clear, specific, and above all, achievable. It also lets kids and teens feel a sense of responsibility, and that they have control over their digital life.<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n 4. Make an initial list of ideas<\/b><\/b><\/p>\n Even though we want our kids to feel included and participate, it\u2019s important for the adults involved to have a general idea of what your family wants to achieve with the agreement, so it aligns with priorities and beliefs. <\/span>Before the discussion, lay out a few rules that you would like to see in the agreement<\/b>, taking your kids\u2019 ages and personalities into account.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/static.qustodio.com\/public-site\/uploads\/2025\/04\/24081357\/2025-04-Blog-How-to-create-a-family-technology-contract-argument-free_InsideImage.png” alt=”talking to your kids to establish a family technology contract” title_text=”2025-04-%91Blog%93-How-to-create-a-family-technology-contract-argument-free_InsideImage” align=”center” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Not all tech use is equal, and the digital challenges that kids face differ across age groups. Here are some rule suggestions that you could use, depending on your child\u2019s age:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Sample tech rules for under 8s<\/b><\/h3>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Sample tech rules for tweens<\/b><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Sample tech rules for teens<\/b><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n During the conversation, work to guide your kids, letting them feel they can suggest and implement rules, while also ensuring the rules and boundaries you think are important are included. <\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n The rules shouldn\u2019t be set in stone, and as your kids get older, their technology needs change – so your digital agreement must reflect this, too. In families where there are kids of different ages, you\u2019ll want to create rules that allow younger kids to understand what\u2019s expected of them when they get older, and help them realize that <\/span>rules can\u2019t always be \u201cone size fits all\u201d<\/b>.<\/span> You can break your rule sets down into different age groups to make it easier to understand:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n With this in mind, <\/span>you can use the two digital agreement templates Qustodio offers<\/b>, one designed for under-8s, and the other for tweens and teens, to help families steer the conversation towards age-appropriate rules and guidelines.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n You\u2019ll also want to consider when to review your rules – for example, every 3 months, just before school vacation, before starting the new year, or when you\u2019ve had a digital setback and <\/span>need to take a new approach<\/span><\/a>. <\/span>Another key moment to review your digital agreement is when giving your child a new device<\/b>: a video console, an iPad, and <\/span>especially a smartphone<\/span><\/a>. The existing digital agreement can work as a great base to add new rules and have deeper conversations about the digital world.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n As a family, talk about the risks and benefits technology can pose. <\/span>Ask your kids to share what they know, what their beliefs are, and talk about their experiences,<\/b> so you can do the same. Listen to them, and share your knowledge of the digital world and online safety. While you\u2019re bringing years of experience to the table, <\/span>they might also share things that you weren\u2019t aware of, making the conversation something everyone can learn from<\/b>. Using these shared experiences and collective knowledge, you can set rules that everyone understands and respects.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Healthy boundaries allow everyone to find balance with technology, protecting the youngest members of the family, and making them aware of both the risks and benefits.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n The benefits you can highlight include:\u00a0<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n On the flip side, we can\u2019t tiptoe around the risks that the online world poses, and kids should be made aware of them (in age-appropriate ways) as they grow with devices. These points can help you <\/span>discuss what they need to know of the risks<\/b>:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_toggle title=”Privacy protection” open=”on” open_toggle_background_color=”#F8FAFD” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n It\u2019s important not to <\/span>reveal sensitive information<\/span><\/a>, such as names, addresses, phone numbers, your school\u2019s name (and school uniform if your child has one), or any data that can potentially point to who they are in \u201creal life\u201d. In the same vein, kids should be taught how to recognize scams, identity theft, or attempts to dig for personal information during online encounters.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_toggle][et_pb_toggle title=”Respect and empathy” open=”on” open_toggle_background_color=”#F8FAFD” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n How should we speak to others? How do we show respect and gain respect? These values are important to instill, and discuss both regarding the real world and the online world. Respect online is important to establish, as it\u2019s easy to forget that there are real people behind the screen, with feelings and beliefs. Your kids should also know how to identify bullying behavior, both as a victim and aggressor, and how to react to online harassment. <\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_toggle][et_pb_toggle title=”Addictive tendencies” open=”on” open_toggle_background_color=”#F8FAFD” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n While screens themselves aren\u2019t necessarily an \u201caddiction\u201d, lots of online activities can <\/span>encourage addictive tendencies<\/span><\/a> and problematic behaviors. Kids should understand the need to establish healthy screen boundaries, limit inappropriate content, and be encouraged to use their devices in more mindful, conscious ways.<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_toggle][et_pb_toggle title=”Content filters” open=”on” open_toggle_background_color=”#F8FAFD” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n Free access to the entire online world, especially from a young age, can expose children to concepts and images <\/span>inappropriate for their age<\/span><\/a>, such as violent or sexual content, which is why it\u2019s important to stress the parents\u2019 role in building safe online spaces with the aid of content filters.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_toggle][et_pb_toggle title=”Digital footprint” open=”on” open_toggle_background_color=”#F8FAFD” _builder_version=”4.24.0″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\nWhy is a family technology contract important?<\/b><\/h2>\n
How to get started with your family technology contract<\/b><\/h2>\n
Inclusion: the secret to success<\/b><\/h2>\n
What kind of rules can we include in our family\u2019s agreement?<\/b><\/h2>\n
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Adapting your family tech contract as time goes by<\/b><\/h2>\n
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Finding digital balance together<\/b><\/h2>\n
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